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Miss Doing the Most

"So what makes you happy?" I asked Don.
"Oh well, good food, " He replied.
I smiled casually, but deep down, I added that to the list of points I needed to add to my skillset. I had been casually asking him what he liked and didn't like so I could know what I needed to pretend to be, in order to keep this one. Yes, keep this one. A man is a purse, meant to be kept!
No juju, no big bumbum, no yellow girl was going to take this one from me.
Big bum, check! I got it. Although six months ago, I didn't. I had spent a loan I took from my uncle which was made for a supposed new business venture (I lied) on getting my bumbum increased in size. Although it hurts sometimes when I sit for long, I didn't care.

Anyway, back to base! Don had mentioned he liked good food, ladies who wore revealing outfits, ladies who barely eat, he didn't like the idea of a woman eating too much food, he wanted them classy he had said. So, tonight I made a conscious effort to avoid my plate like a plaque. I ate only four Spoons of rice and casually said, "oh, I'm full. Why do they make the plates here so full?"
He said wow in an impressed manner.
Yes girl, get it, get it, he's falling for you.

Don stared at me for a really long while without saying a word. I guess he was falling in love and words were not enough to convey his feelings.
After a while, I took my purse, and said, "it's getting late, maybe we should leave?"
He obliged, took his wallet, paid and held my hand lightly while we walked to the door. He opened and said, "ladies first."
I obliged feeling like a princess. As we walked to the car, he was mute.
I began to imagine that he was thinking of the right things to say in order to ask for another date when he asked, "So how much do you make a week?"
I said, "um it's not fixed. Sometimes a hundred thousand naira."
Then he sighed, and said, "I can't date you. You're way out of my league. I earn one hundred and fifty thousand naira a month. How am I supposed to keep up with you? I don't eat six spoons and waste a plate of food that cost fifteen thousand naira, I'm sorry, I just can't."

There I was, frozen in my seat, mogbe! What do men want? Should I have been honest that I was really just a private school teacher earning eighty thousand a month? 

Comments

  1. Josephine20 May 2020 at 14:01

    I think you should have told the truth. Being a teacher is a blessing. Imagine having a wife as a teacher during lockdown. He will stay if he wants to

    ReplyDelete
  2. GuySmile20 May 2020 at 15:23

    The big bum bum. I know he will like it big.
    ��

    ReplyDelete
  3. Unknown20 May 2020 at 15:30

    👍👍👍👍

    ReplyDelete
  4. CcTiana28 September 2020 at 13:19

    I think her sincerity would have gained her a second date.

    ReplyDelete

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