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Eye Contact and Bread

There are certain people you really should not look in the eye. If you are Nigerian, you're probably thinking of older people, especially your parents. If you're not Nigerian, well, you may picture quite a wide range of people. For one, a liar. People often believe that liars or dishonest people find it difficult to maintain eye contact during conversations. Thus, when a person tries to avoid the gaze of another, it's very likely that the person is a crook!
But here I am, at Oshodi Bus Park, Waiting for the vehicle to move quick. I am completely in my right, paid my fare, occupying just the right passenger space and not playing a song from any unusually loud 'chinko'  phone.
Then, somebody moves me into the wrong.
"Aunty, buy bread. Sweet sweet bread. Aunty, buy bread na, " a seller insists.
First things first, I stiffen my neck. I ensure that it does not turn in any direction. You see, there's a kind of commitment you make to these people, when you look at their goods. It's worse when you look them in the eye. It is as though you're sealing the business deal spiritually between both parties before your physical body decides to buy. So, I stiffen my neck more. I pray she goes away. No, she stays. "Aunty, buy bred for yor fren dem na. Sweeet sweeeet bred."
I strengthen my resolve, no bread buying today. There are lots of breads to choose from when I get to Ibadan.
......
Her voice lowers, persistence drops. I assume she is gone. Dear Neck is tired by now. I release her. She has done a lot. Subconsciously, I look to my left. Bread Seller is still there. "Aunty, which one make I bring?" she says.
I get a little bit mad and make the wrong decision. I look her in the eye. Then, I get insight into the imagined stereotypes I have of roadside sellers. I reason, she must be a single mother trying to send her poor child to school. I look in her eyes again, they tell me I am right. They also say she is hungry. I realise, I have failed. Committed myself to buying something from her.
I open my purse, two dirty notes of 200 Naira, one slightly abused than the other. I realise that I cannot patronize her. I wave her off. Her eyes beckon once more, I wave her off. Just in time, the bus pulls away from the park, and moves.
I know, I know, I have betrayed another today. I should never have looked her in the eye. 

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